Ever wonder how the best TGOG-ers got to be that way? You don't just wake up some morning in tenth grade and say, "Mom, Dad, I figured out what I want to do with my life. My ambition is to spend every weekday for the rest of my years on this great green planet sitting in a huge room with hundreds of other sociology majors from second-rate colleges who also have no marketable skills or self-respect. I will earn an ass-kissing black belt by sucking up each and every day to hyper-intelligent narcissists who would sooner lick a toilet seat than make eye contact with another human being. I will become a Grandmaster of incomprehensible financial jargon and I will develop the ability to speak for hours at a time without ever saying anything. I will operate a specially outfitted keyboard, a keyboard which features many buttons that I will never touch. Why? Because I will push only the same three buttons in the same sequence hundreds of thousands of times, and always to no effect. I will be told only after my retirement that my keyboard was not actually connected to anything. Should I ever somehow stumble into an actual transaction, I will be certain that the parties to that transaction have squeezed out any possibility of profit for me or my firm.
Mom, Dad, I want to sell high yield bonds to hedge funds."
